Inspired by Julie Zhuo's A User Guide to Working with You
Introduction
Hi! I’m Xiaomin. I’m delighted that we’ll be working together. I want to share some basics about me up front so that you can get a sense of me as a person, what are my values, quirks, and growth areas.
I truly believe everyone has something to learn from each other and to teach one another. I hope to keep this "how-to" as a living document for the years to come and build the strongest relationship possible with you!
How I view success
As a user experience/UX/product designer (whatever the title your org chooses), I love it when folks see me as the "go-to person" for design questions or advice or please-save-the-world kind of tasks. Some call "subject matter expert" or SME. That means you trust me and my expertise and value me as a reliable resource.
Viewing success through the business lens can mean they are tangible and measurable, but often times the lessons we learn along the way and the emotions we internalized are far more priceless. And passing them along to others can help lift each other up. To me, that is the key to human-centered design.
No matter the win is big or small, it's a cause for celebration. We all respond better to recognition. At the same time, stay humble to always strive to do better.
Success is not just a beautifully crafted prototype, or a flawlessly delivered executive showcase presentation. Lessons, learnings, breakdowns, frustrations, and conflicts are all part of the success we should cherish because they help us build the path to success, however windy that might be.
How I communicate
In the group setting, I don't often talk my thoughts out loud because I'm afraid I may sound rambling. But I highly encourage you to call me out and put me on the spot so that I don't let the habit of keeping things inside my head get to me and not sharing enough.
Face time is very important in the remote collaboration environment, so if internet bandwidth is willing, I'd like to turn on the camera and I encourage you to do the same. :)
I like to be specific and thorough. If I tell you I'll get a certain task done by a certain time, consider it done. Although we all know things don't always go as planned, so if you don't hear back from me within 1 workday, re-ping me as I might be overbooked therefore slow at responding.
If something needs a great deal of context and description, I prefer live discussions so please ping me to talk it over in real-time. Even if just a quick 10-15min ad-hoc chat.
If it's about sharing asynchronous design feedback, I prefer integrated features provided by design tools, such as Comments on InVision, or annotation on PDF. It saves you time to describe the context and helps me track and pinpoint where the comments are for.
If something is urgent or easy to respond to, send me an instant message (e.g. Skype, Teams, Slack, etc), and I often can respond within the hour.
I'm usually punctual to attend meetings. If I'm late or foresee I may be 1-5 minutes late, I will drop you a note (IM or email). I encourage you to do the same to keep me posted.
I'm continually working on being more direct and succinct. If the feedback and suggestions I give you don't sound clear or useful to you, please let me know. We can exchange thoughts over emails or schedule a 15-30min chat to talk things through.
I don't usually pick up phone calls if I don't recognize the number, so leave a voicemail and I will call you back ASAP. If we have exchanged cellphone numbers in the past, I will likely save them in my contacts for future communications.
Things I do that may annoy you
I have a tendency to get impatient easily if someone doesn't cut through the noise and get to the point quickly. I'm working on being better at communicating more direct so I don't end up holding a double standard for others.
I am on the hyper-rational end of the emotional spectrum. This can be annoying when you share a problem or feeling with me, and I respond with a bunch of rationalized and logical suggestions when what the situation called for was listening and empathy. I will do my best to remember to take deep breaths and remind myself of the differences in personality type.
I'm very comfortable with ambiguity but I'm also a goal-driven planner. To get from point A to point B and be as productive as I can be, I love making lists of specific action items and pragmatic options. This may be overwhelming if you feel like it's too much to consume...
I work very well with deadlines and tend to hold the same high standard for others. This can be annoying if you sense me seem to be demanding, critical, and never satisfied rather than supportive, flexible, encouraging, or empathetic.
What gains and loses my trust
The easiest way to win my trust is to care about getting high-quality outcomes and to be transparent about what you think is going well or not well. I admire people with keen self-awareness, who are constantly looking to learn, and who admit their challenges and growth areas. I also admire people who go out of their way to ask others for feedback—whether about a piece of design work, a project proposal, or their own behavior—and use it to improve.
Another thing that builds my trust is extreme ownership of a problem. I am impressed when someone goes out of her way not just to identify a problem, but to rally the right people and processes in solving it. I love it when people use all the resources at their disposal—including me!—to overcome challenges in their path.
I appreciate people who make commitments and stick to them. If you are the overly optimistic type, who tends to idealize what can be reasonably done, I expect you to come to recognize and improve on this over time, and to reset expectations as soon as you realize a commitment cannot be fulfilled. I lose trust in people who repeatedly fail to honor their commitments or give empty promises.
I have little tolerance for those who frequently complain about problems or try to shift responsibility to others. If something is not right or not working the way you like it to be, be the first one to do something about it.
If I give you repeated feedback about your work or your behavior and nothing changes as a result, it will diminish my trust in you. I will do my best to debug why this is happening, as perhaps my feedback was unclear, or my expectations are unrealistic, but please help me to understand this as well.
It’s easier for me to build trust with you if you treat me like a peer and a partner, versus someone you are trying to impress or power over.
My strengths
Organized and detail-oriented. Think Marie Kondo, and better. I'm obsessed with being meticulously organized and I do sweat with details.
Execution/follow-through. I may not be the person always with fresh new ideas, but my way of getting things done is usually tight, diligent, and speedy follow-through.
Reliable and perseverant. I don't easily give up or surrender even when things don't appear to work in my favor. I'm good at giving realistic self-talk and staying the course, so if you need to count on someone to push through and go the distance, I'm that person.
Meta-prioritization. I have my own prioritization systems to do specific work, juggle relationships (old and new), learning, and thinking. If I can help you be more productive, please let me know.
Staying calm, collected, and optimistic. I don't get overly emotional, and I do a good job of staying balanced. I am good at translating optimism into actionable plans. This makes me effective at working under pressure and sorting out complex issues.
My growth areas
Asking for help. I'm a product of China's single-child policy in the 1980s. Unlike the stereotypical Chinese families in the same era, luckily my parents didn't spoil me, but instead, they raised me to be hyper-independent and hands-on. That means I may seem stubborn at trying to resolve problems all by myself and do not seek out to use all the resources at my disposal. I'm working on becoming better at being okay with asking for help does not make me weak.
Being more open to being challenged by different points of view. I tend to dive deep into one subject if I find great interest in something, or just being content with what I already know. I'm working on spending more time and energy to venture into other areas that might help me better understand the connectivity and intersection between things.
Storytelling: I tend to remember lessons, not stories. Or I tend to assume what I've experienced is ordinary, boring, and not worth sharing. But I've come to learn that stories are one of the most effective ways of imparting lessons and others can draw inspiration from on their own terms. I’m working on becoming a better storyteller in my communication.
How I give and receive feedback
Be specific and direct and not transactional. I don't believe in the 'sandwich' approach where a piece of critical feedback is layered between two compliments, which may be something just for the sake of giving feedback. Although if you do genuinely have something nice to say or acknowledge how and what I do well, please verbalize it.
Good feedback to me means you constructively and thoughtfully challenge what I say or how I behave. I will do my utmost to do the same.